Ikea-Brand Skull-Cracker

We pounded on the door for about a ninety seconds- the length of time we called "the hurry-and-wipe time"- and made our way to the entrance of the aging apartment building when there was no answer. As far as we knew, Johnny didn't leave the building more than a few times a month. He enjoyed his privacy.
I jingled my keys absently, while I thought of something. "If the infection has made it out to Suburbia, it's probably safe to say that it's here too."
Willy looked at the shotgun in his hand. "I'm going to grab something different."
He grabbed my keys and ran up the stairs two at a time.
I cracked open the door and peeked out. Everything looked normal; this area of the city was still a craphole, but it didn't look any worse than normal, except that no people were on the streets, not even the normal homeless people at the dilapidated bus stop.
Will hopped back down the stairs.
"It looks clear," I said, opening the door slowly and stepping into the chill of the early Fall.
The street was even quieter than the little crack in the door showed.
"Alright, since the streets ahead may be blocked off, we'll go on foot to..." I trailed off. "What is that?" I asked Willy.
"It's something I just invented, using things from the apartment!" He smacked his palm with the club and grinned. "See, I took this chunk of wood -"
Angie interrupted. "Is that a leg from my table?"
"Yep," said Willy, as Angie grabbed the club from him.
Angie sighed. "Dude, that's from Ikea." She hit the wall lightly. "I don't think it will hold up too long." She handed it back.
Willy cleared his throat. "Anyways, I took this table leg and the roll of bailing wire, and wrapped some silverware onto the shaft."
Kate snorted. "Shaft..." she mumbled under her breath.
Willy raised an eyebrow at Kate and continued. "Now it has enough weight and hardness to crack a skull."
"Why the duct tape?" I asked.
Willy shrugged. "Why not? You can never go wrong with tape."
I nodded. "You're right. We'll see if we can get you a pipe or brick or something later."